Allow me to Elaborate.
January 22, 2015 While getting ready for the day, I was putting on make-up. It was near to impossible with Intention Tremor showing a stronger face than ever before. People had noticed a faint tremor in my hands from time to time. I noticed the Intention Tremor, a common side effect of Lithium, once in a while. It never got in the way of my fine motor requirements until this day.
Side effect suddenly very strong. Next question: would I benefit from stopping Lithium? No. Reducing? Yes. I had been taking 600 mg following my initial titration off of 2 other meds and then 50 % reduction from the 1200mg Lithium dose used during my Inpatient stay with a Manic Episode back in October 2012. By January 2013, my titration activities were completed.
Loved the weak-voiced declaration I made to myself within weeks of discharge from the traumatic Involuntary Inpatient experience, complete with a short stint in Lock Down. I declared, If I believe the System and the Doctors, my Life as I have known and dreamt about would be over.
My Best Chance is to Believe In Myself: Wholeheartedly.
What have I got to lose? I am a Doctor. I know how tightly the Medical Establishment can cling on to concepts. Letting Go is not their Forte. In the case of Psychiatry as a Specialty Field, the shame associated with the current Scientific Beliefs compared to my own Expert (based on my own personal experience as both a Patient and a Doctor) Opinion would be enough to inspire Suicide. I fully forgive any and all involved. Absolved of all Offense. This System was created by Players long dead. I Understand as few on Earth now could. I have the deepest Compassion. The concept that Manic Patients lack insight is the Order 66 neutralizing the Power of a unique Creative Force in our World. Now termed the Bipolar Patient. In my case, I upgrade to someone who has had an OOE (Out of the Ordinary Experience) that initiated a process of healing in a Wounded Healer. The Field of Psychiatry has a lot more to lose than I do.
Medical History often reads like a Horror Book. Psychiatric Stories are just another Chapter.
The Hippocratic Oath: Primum non nocere. First, Do No Harm
Another way to state it is that, given an existing problem, it may be better not to do something, or even to do nothing, than to risk causing more harm than good.
Whenever any Patient takes a Medication, I am concerned that the Hippocratic Oath is violated. Lots of room for Discussion there. In Psychiatry, Big Pharma is so intertwined with Science, Experts are challenged to see the Forest for the Trees.
I have a habit of beating around the bush with my Stories. This writing is a departure. My experiences as a Psychiatric Patient and a Family Doctor together have Transmutated my Understanding. Transmutation is the Key. Understanding the concept falls into the Teachings of Quantum Physics.
Take a Quantum Leap of Faith. If you have not already done so.
Bruce Lipton (1:22 Short Video), Author of Biology of Belief, a former Scientific Researcher who stumbled upon Epigenetics decades ago before it was even a Science. Epigenetics is a Science that formed when it became apparent that the Environment influences our Genetic Expressions. Our Thoughts, our Perceptions about the World are translated into Chemical Secretions by the Brain. The secretions go into the Blood which is the Culture Medium of the 50 Trillion cells in my Skin-covered Petri Dish. The Composition of the Culture Medium controls the Genetics. … You Change the Chemistry by Changing Your Perceptions. When you Change Your Perceptions, You Change Your Genetic Activity. Bruce Lipton. The OLD message: genes determine your life. You are Victim to your genes. The New Science turns it completely around. You can influence your genes and their products via your Perception. You are Master of your Biology.
To Integrate the Important Concepts of Quantum Physics & Epigenetics into Healthcare Will Reap Miraculous Results. Keep in mind that a Miracle is just Reality viewed through a different Lens or Mindset. A different Perception.
Could not help but Notice:
1. The Professionals giving Inpatient Care are Blinded by Fear … of the Patients. Clear to my perception was the Fear from harm at the hands of the patients far outstripped the True Risk. Fear is a Powerful Force. Challenges efforts of Discernment. Good Healthcare hard-pressed when delivered through the lens of Fear. Human Atrocities clutter the History Books when Fear and Misunderstanding are combined.
2. Those same Professionals appeared more unwell to my Discerning Eye than most of the Inpatients around me. Skepticism and mistrust have a lower Energetic Vibration.
3. The Psychiatric Inpatient System would benefit from Collaboration with Psychics or Medical Intuitives, for lack of a better description. Artful skills in Holistic Human Wellness and the Energetic Component of same would Synergize any and all Healthcare.
4. Mode of Questioning in Acute Psychiatric Assessment breaks most of the Rules taught in Medical School. Questions were very closed and incriminating. Personally, I felt railroaded into the box they call Mania. There was no Allowance for Discovery. The Medical Professional makes the assumption that Scientific Knowledge in this area is correct and valid. There is no other area in Medicine where the Doctor does not Listen to the Patient. By Design. It is the Achilles Heel of Psychiatry. The Good News: it could be turned around to become the Savior. The Skeleton of all Great Stories.
February 18, 2015 Reviewed a Blog about me by the Producers of an Inspiring film called Crazywise. My Interview, filmed in Brazil October 2014, Awakened my inspiration to voice my deep belief that the Psychiatric System can Upgrade its Understanding. Optimal Patient Care will result.
Interest in Spiritual Matters was a box to be checked on the checklist taking away my Sovereignty. Rather than a common pathway leading to an increased or changed Energy flow through the Body.
I Object: to a System that Fails to take into consideration the Energetic Component to our Physical Body.
Eastern Philosophy has harmonized knowledge available for thousands of years. It is the basis of many of the Healing Arts. Acupuncture, being one example, is the most accepted by the Medical Establishment within the Energetic Modalities. I have long admired Dr. Steven Aung, a local well-respected & recognized World-Class Practitioner. Many Medical Doctors hone their Intuition under his Guidance. He has Certified Many Acupuncture Practitioners within the Medical Ranks over many years. His Document Integrative, Compassionate Medicine: The Most Powerful Healing Art for the 21st Century and Beyond echoes some of my ideas.
Thank you Dr. Aung. His article brought back a memory from my time in active Practice. Huge chink in the Armor of Medical Science. Medical Science counts on high quality Research to validate Therapeutic Decisions. Specific Drugs, for example. Gold Standard. The RCT, Randomized Controlled Trials. Rare for results to stand up to the Gold Standard. System Makes do as Best it Can.
Some Practical and Relevant questions go unanswered by the Science Research Machine. Machine is fueled with Money to generate Profits. Not always, but almost. Questions motivated by the Highest need and good depend on a limited pool of Public Funds. I challenge the relevance of a System with this significant Profit-driven bias.
“It is simply no longer possible to believe much of the clinical research that is published, or to rely on the judgment of trusted physicians or authoritative medical guidelines. I take no pleasure in this conclusion, which I reached slowly and reluctantly over my two decades as an editor of The New England Journal of Medicine.” Dr. Marcia Angell. I inject this quote & link after the fact, January 2016. NEJM Editor: “No longer possible to believe much of clinical research published”
The Biology of Belief. Nocebo/Placebo. Medical Science is challenged to Believe that Belief holds Therapeutic Power. Despite the fact that RCT’s do exist to support the concept.
Belief holds Therapeutic Power.
Let us just Pretend that this is accepted Fact. If it is, then every participant (Researchers and Research Subjects) inject some of their Power into each and every Research Trial. It is no wonder the results are difficult to interpret and duplicate. Asking the Optimal Questions is required for the most Relevant Results. Believing in the Power of Belief, in a sense, negates the classic Medical Research Machine. The results of the RCT are irrelevant. You believe (over time, you just know) that by taking care of your own health and listening to your intuitive nudges; you will Achieve Optimal Health, overcome Health Obstacles.
As I often say: Not right and wrong but two versions of right. Your Belief is Right. … But so is Mine.
Clearly, these two Mindsets do not marry well. Agree to disagree with each other would be an Upgrade.
Live and Let Live is the Bridge to Health.
Drugs like Lithium, the only Drug I take, sidestepped the Machine. Lithium has been used for over 40 years. Another Era. It is one of the cheaper Medications out there. Its lack of profitability has left it in the War Chest with minimal understanding of how and why it works in comparison to the Drugs released today. Not a bad thing. It holds better Evidence-based backing for effective treatment of Mania in Bipolar Disorder than any other drug. But given its lack of profitability, it would never be developed in the Medical Science climate of Today.
My greatest concern is not proving Right or Wrong. Do not want to debate it too much.
My Highest Concern is being Free to Choose. Time for the Legally-Empowered System to accept that other Mindsets are also Valid.
************** Tangent Ends
Studying Ancient Wisdom, Energetic and Psychic Healing are longtime Passions of mine. A Friend and Intuitive Healer was by my side in Emergency October 2012 which bolstered me to stand firmly in my Belief in Myself. My views did not match Medical Science. It is not a Crime, is it? My Psychiatrist friends were too busy being Overwhelmed in the System they stepped into with Full Trust. I encourage us all to ask, “Has the System earned my Trust?”
Historically, someone decided that Bipolar Patients lack insight into their own condition: creating a story that will be difficult to shake for this subgroup of Human Beings. Whose numbers are growing, I understand. I translate lacking insight to patient’s insight does not match doctor’s insight. My Experience: Mania was simply a large shift in the way energy moved through my body. Specific actions released some blocks to energy flow. Led to large effects. Another might have the same but more gradual and never enter the World of Psychiatry. My first Out of the Ordinary Experience, 2012, I felt a surge of energy flowing throughout my body: an Upgrade in my level of Energetic Vibration. It felt like blowing a fuse with all the filters/Belief Systems I maintained. Seeing myself through the Belief Systems, it was like an energetic auto-immune disease. Those Beliefs and filters melted away. No longer able to exist with this higher vibration. No longer overwhelmed by my experiences after I had integrated the change. My sense is that this was a positive personal transformation. Something to celebrate, not mourn. Not for the fainthearted. It was physically overwhelming but did not last long. I will always wonder how long would it have lasted without medications? What would the Natural History of my Condition have been?
My perception: entering the Involuntary Mental Health System impacted my Recovery. Not completely negatively, but not completely positively either. I was in crisis and required help. After the first few days, it resembled captivity more than healthcare delivery. Just sayin’. Care lacked warmth. Every action I made was fit into the Diagnosis, even when comparing polar opposite responses. I did not feel like caretakers were trying to understand me but only to judge each and every action and label it as pathology. Check & Chart, as I have come to call it. Stifling. Easily saw that I would not win that Game. Keep in mind, no attempt to Understand or Hear me has occurred. Admittedly, I was pretty shy about sharing my information at the onset and years following. I clearly had insight as to how it would be received. Once it is determined that you have experienced an unshared Reality. Boom – enter the System. You are now sentenced to Life as a Mentally Ill Patient. Anything you say, has been and will be held against you. More like the Legal System than the Health System. No cure. New information: Will not hear. My Doctor rewrote my past and my future and proceeded to sell it to me. It was no soft sell either. Consistently, I agreed to disagree. This vein of communication was the mainstay throughout my care. Firm grasp to the assumption that anything not yet known by the Psychiatric System is not worth knowing. They believe themselves wholeheartedly. I suspect many are unaware there are viable, superior options.
The Psychotic drowns in the same waters that the Mystic swims with delight. Joseph Campbell
I am so very Grateful to the Adventurous Travelers in our world. I see Phil Borges, one of the Producers of Crazywise, as one of them. He was able to see the similarity between the supported transformation towards becoming a Shaman and Mentally Ill Patients.
The world of Psychiatry: where Experience does not make you an Expert.
I have Expertise that most Psychiatrists lack. Tricky here: Doctors call it a Symptom. Patients call it an Experience. Monumental Difference. Both groups hold steadfast to their Belief. This conundrum is unique to Psychiatry. You use the mind/thoughts to assess the symptoms displayed by the mind/thoughts. Crisis, like with Mania, is an extremely vulnerable time. What I highlight is that there are factors not being considered in this Serious State of Affairs. First, Do No Harm. I would honor a chance to work towards Optimal Understanding. History taught a strong-armed approach. We are Free to change our approach. Now.
Who Will Save Your Soul by Jewel
I share my Theory.
Mental Illness is simply when a Person’s Expressed (Repressed) version of themselves gets too far away from their True Nature.
In a Nutshell.
The Solutions lie more with Awareness than the Biomedical Model. The Physics of Consciousness. By insisting that these conditions are simply caused by a Diseased Brain and altered Brain Chemistry, we choose to look away from the more effective, simpler, Holistic approaches to a Healthy Human Being. Consider more broadly than Disease and Cure. Reframe Healthcare with any/all of the following words:
Abolish, Clear, Dismiss, Dispose of, Erase, Eject, Eradicate, Expel, Expunge, Remove, Purge, Unload, Wipe Out – Self Doubt.
Ameliorate, Refine, Refresh, Rehabilitate, Reinstate, Purify – Your True Self.
Launch – into the Life of Your Dreams. Health, Love, Prosperity, Peace.
Medical Science Assumes it knows what a Natural, Healthy Human Being looks like. I Challenge that Assumption.
Shine by Collective Soul
If we continue to invest our Human Energy and Resources towards Foundationally Flawed Assumptions, we steer further away from the Solutions. It is Time to ask Ourselves, Are We Spending Healthcare Dollars Wisely?
It is Challenging to See the Solution, when You Are Part of the Problem. Explains why Optimal Care has been so Evasive. We have been Stuck In A Loop for a very long time. Scientific Understanding passed down Generation to Generation.
It is time to Step Back and Ask the Optimal Questions.
Notable First Step in the Dream: Exonerate the Field of Psychiatry.
The Body is a Conduit of Energy. Belief Systems can act like Resistance. When an increased flow of Energy is experienced and blocks/beliefs counter to the Natural Human state are present, it is like a Fuse is blown. More in Mania and Schizophrenia. Exploring Spiritual Wisdom, not the only way, leads to an increased flow of Energy through the Body System. When blocks to Energy Flow are first removed/fall away, the initial surge in Energy can create a Crisis and appear very chaotic in the Individual. Adaptation over time, this increased Energy results in a more Joyful, exuberant existence. Youthfulness is maintained longer. Improved Health Outcomes including Miracle Cures is experienced.
Depression is when the Beliefs/Blocks are in place preventing an Optimal flow of Energy through the Body’s Energy System. Lack of vitality is the result. No amount of medications will enable the energy to flow smoothly through the body. That is why Cognitive Therapy has fared so well against Medications in the Medical Literature. It has the capability to shift perceptions and beliefs, leading to a more Harmonious Flow of Energy. Medications can provide symptomatic benefit. Most effective when the Patient believes they will benefit from taking Meds. Medications cannot trump a Patient’s Belief that they will not work. Hence: that good old fashioned Trust and Understanding is Essential to a Functional Doctor:Patient Relationship. It is the Foundation upon which good Health Outcomes are generated. In all areas of Medicine. Bar None.
Placebo Effect. Nocebo Effect. Origin: Patient’s Energy and Belief.
Collaboration with the Patient is Rewarding.
Always my very Favorite part of being a Family Doctor. My repeated exclamation that my Medical work was like Spitting Into The Wind was due to the Patient not coming on-board to the goal of Wellness. Being that fantastical Doctor that I was, I knew that I would not achieve much without their buy-in. The same is True for Psychiatric Patients. Somehow, in my experiences with the Medical System, I found myself partnered with people not aligned to the same Health Outcomes as I. I found it extremely unsatisfactory as the Family Doctor. I will Reject it as the Patient. Unacceptable by any terms. Kind of like my Experience with Politics. I have never in my history seen my vote align with the winning candidate.
Democracy is two wolves and a Lamb deciding what to have for Lunch. Liberty is a well-armed Lamb contesting the Vote. Benjamin Franklin
Understanding the Scale of Consciousness is Essential to Good Psychiatric Care. Clinically relevant to know where on the Scale a Psychiatric Patient exists. Only the Patients at the lower end of the Scale pose real risks to Health Care Staff. The Wards were filled with Loving, Peaceful people. Spirituality was outwardly Embraced by the Majority of Patients. Huge issue that confounds the clarity is the Activist Energy that gets stimulated in the Patients. Patient’s Beliefs do not match those of the Captors: the Health Care Professionals with Legally-backed Powers that sidestep Personal Rights and Freedoms normally belonging to the Individuals prior to Mental Illness Declaration. It is a rare individual who can maintain their Peaceful existence in the face of strong-armed tactics to deliver care that opposes their Belief System. Particularly challenging to Trust Caregivers who do not actually want to Hear about Experiences. Discount Experiences. Do not share the same Mindset. Act as the Judge, the Jury … and the Caregiver? One is held Captive to Another’s Mindset. Pure and Simple.
As Well-Intentioned as the System is, Authoritarian Captivity & Treatment of an Alternative (Viable) Mindset is NOT Science. Not Cool.
When One applies their Uninformed Mindset onto Another without Informed Consent: I Call That Bullying.
My Proclamation: It is not about Right and Wrong (Mindsets) but two versions of Right.
The two Mindsets look at the same thing and interpret it differently. Very expansive to think in this way. The Fear-Based Mindset is hard-pressed to be capable of doing this. The Alternative Mindset, not based in Fear, can do it with Ease. Yet they are held Captive in not sharing the Mindset with the Historical & Present Majority.
Big Dream: This Concept will be Understood. Very. Soon. Like Now.
I know that I am not Wrong. Why did it bother the Medical Establishment Mindset so much? Worth noting that the majority of questions to me from my Psychiatrist, while I was an Inpatient, revolved around (a) Medication Side Effects and (b) Did I believe in the Doctor’s Mindset. Debates grew tiresome. It is impossible for me to speak untruth. What I used to think was a curse, I now call my Superpower. I came up with a handy retort, Let us Agree to Disagree. The debates were not good for my Mental Health. Insane to my Perception.
Live and Let Live. The Bridge to Health. The Bridge to Peace.
The Caregivers refuse to Listen to Patients. They are quick to pigeon-hole Out of the Ordinary Experiences as a pre-ordained Psychiatric Symptom. Lack of Trust runs both ways and undermines Health Outcomes in Epic proportions. Do not underestimate the Level of Suffering that originates simply from a Patient not feeling Heard.
Hypothesis: Discerning Experts in Mental Health & Energetics (I would volunteer!) work alongside Traditional Medical Practitioners and aid them in how to tweak their approach. Results will be Improved. I Guarantee it. There is a risk for completely overturning the way we look at Psychiatric Care. Patients will turn into People in Crisis. Through better Understanding, they will be better supported through a Personal Transformation. They will be highly motivated to give back to the system. The System will be easily serviced with a Smile as more people Transform.
There will still be a place for Care as we know it. Especially for those patients who present from a lower Energetic starting point. Their lives would be following different themes to the Higher Energy Patients. Anger, Guilt and Shame are Emotions that closely describe the Patient’s mindset. Traditional Methods may be required. When supported in the right framework, I hypothesize that they would rise in their Energetic Vibration over time. I do not know. I wonder about less medication than Traditional but more than what the Higher Vibe Patient would benefit best from. The Emotions dictating the lives of those resonating at a Higher Vibration would be Peace, Love, Harmony. Hippie qualities from the 1960’s.
Key concepts I encourage the Profession to address:
1. Could our dosages be too high for the majority of Patients? Again, addressing the Level of Energetic Vibration will aid in determining who needs the more Traditional higher dose approach and who will be likely to receive symptomatic relief with significantly lower dosages.
2. What is the Natural History of the conditions considered as Mental Illness? I hypothesize that with this new Understanding it will Revolutionize what we consider the Natural History. Better outcomes for a higher percentage of people.
3. Are we meeting the Basic Human Needs for Human Beings in the setting of Psychiatric Care?
Helpful to know simple Holistic Effective Therapeutics.
1. Hugs are an extremely effective treatment modality for the High Vibration Patient. Risk to Health Care Worker of receiving healing energy themselves. Note my cheeky tone. The Risk is better described as a Benefit but I know how these Medical Types think. I tease. The High Vibe Psychiatric Patient is well known for extremely effective Hugs. Many areas to address that currently undermine the access to this simple, low cost, effective therapy. Human Nature serves a Bountiful Supper. When you take Humanity out of Health Care, Positive Health Outcomes become more elusive.
2. Listen to the Patients to develop a Trusting Relationship that can Support Healing. The Staff are likely to Learn a Lot. Keeping an Open Mind: Essential. You don’t know what you don’t know.
3. Allow Patients to take Responsibility for their own Care and Healing. With the best intentions, the System can be quite determined to have the Patient Accept all aspects of Medically Established Diagnosis and Therapy. When the Legal System is required to give escalating Power to the Caregivers in the Patient’s best interest: Red Flag. Beware! Have our results been improved by this approach? By whose Assessment? It is not a lack of Power & Authority that undermines Psychiatric Care but a lack of Trust & Understanding. Perhaps, even a lack of Humanity. (Gasp!!) Compassion comes in handy.
It is Time … to take a Step Back … and Start Again.
If a System of Care is established with a Questionable Foundation, the Care delivered will, at best, be Sub-Optimal. If we take our Hippocratic Oath to Heart, I do not believe we can continue on as we are knowing as little as we do.
Listen to me Now. Believe me Later.
As I left Inpatient care the first time, I had strong intuition that the Traditional Medical view of Bipolar Disorder and Mania did not hold up in My Case. My views were supported by my Experience over time.
Experience is the Best Teacher.
I boldly (my tongue is firmly in my cheek) titrated my medications down aggressively. Within weeks of discharge. Second time admitted could have been completely avoided. A trial of discontinuing Lithium proved Premature. Within two days of restarting the med, all well again. Despite this, thirteen days in hospital. Discharge coincided with the date of my Hearing Dispute. Thirteen days was the earliest my case could be heard. Not the most Democratic of Systems to my Eye. Why spend less, when you can spend more? Referring to Healthcare Dollars here. We can deliver care much more cost effectively. Where there is a will, there is a way.
Time has passed. Two years, four months since my Ordination as a Psychiatric Patient. I now take a sub-therapeutic dose of Lithium, 300mg. One Medication. I am a little reluctant to stop completely but will try when and if it feels appropriate.
My Hypothesis: the day will come. I will Recognize it when it does.
My Existence, My Story serves as a nudge to:
Unlearn all we have Learned. Question what we think we Know.
Freedom … is Priceless.
As a Society, can we ever achieve Freedom so long as some choose to use their Freedom to limit the Freedom of Others?
Quote was the result of a Beautiful Tête-a- Tête with my 17 Year Old Daughter. The Wisdom of Youth. It all started when she questioned,
Wouldn’t it be more accurate to say Opinion when currently we use the word Truth?
My Answer: Yes.
Reality is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Health is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Love is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Beauty is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Peace is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Live. And Let Live.
Hope is Relative to the Eye of the Beholder.
Let Me Be Understood. Let me Reword that. I Insist on Being Understood. People are getting Hurt.
First. Do. No. Harm.
To Clarify the Dream: To Enable the most Effective, Healing System for both the Caregivers and those Cared For.
Let There Be Hope …
Addendum: If you are a Healthcare Provider within the Psychiatric System and noticed yourself become angry, defiant or any other untoward emotional state, I ask you to use this experience to aid in augmenting Compassion for your Patients. Many patients feel the very same way about your Care. Reading this Article could be called Experiential Learning – the very best kind. Just by reading this, you cannot help but Understand Your Patients more than you did prior. No Matter which way you choose to Perceive this: You Can’t Lose.
Gain Perspective. Gain Understanding. Or Both. Your Choice.
Freedom. Gotta Love It!!
All I Have To Do Is Dream by Matthew Barber & Jill Barber
My Intention with this Document/Story: Assimilate this Loving, Quantum Message Optimally, Right Now. …With Ease and Grace.
Gregg Braden, author of The Spontaneous Healing of Belief, says in the short linked video:
In the old way of thinking, we would ask ourselves …”what can I get from the world that exists?”. Subconsciously or Consciously. … The new discoveries of Science give us a reason to change that question. … What can I give? What can I share? What can I contribute? What can I offer to the World that is Emerging? The way we answer that question changes everything. …Opens the door to New Possibilities… By virtue of a contribution aligned with one’s passion, we are rewarded. Time and time again.
You May Also Want to Read WRAP It Up
February 27, 2015
Hot off the Press!
Perception … is Everything.
Is the Dress White & Gold Or Blue & Black? A Little Experiential Teaching reminding us how the Mind and Science come together. Perception varies. Completely OK. Amazing how differently the same dress can appear to two different people. Another example of Things are Not Always what They Seem.
Don’t Believe Everything You Think. The Nature of Perception. All the more reason to Live and Let Live.
April 26, 2015 Quantum Physics: Relevant to the Field of Psychiatry.
Reality is … not what it seems.
October 17, 2015 Peer-Assisted Open Dialogue is a compassionate model of care being used for a decade in Finland and has spread in Europe. Clinical results have shown ten times higher rates of educating/employed among first time Psychotic Episode patients. My report linked.